Week 4

Research shows that for an act to become a habit of life, it needs to be repeated over a period of time. If you feel you are still struggling with the weekly commitment to keep up with the Marriage Moments commitment at this stage, it is normal. It shows that it is yet to take root in your life. Keep giving focus and allocating time to it. A regular time set aside to read the weekly resource in the book, and to spend time on your own and with your spouse to respond to the suggested things to think about and to do, will help towards establishing the habit.

The key thing at this point is to keep the weekly ‘appointment’ and let this become a part of your life for one another.

Personality

Personality is about how we act and react to most life circumstances, especially in the default mode (something that we do without us thinking much about it, especially after the couple has been married for a while, and what is referred to as one’s characteristic pattern of behavior and thought).

A key part of the communication between couples is the perception of the message he thinks the partner is trying to convey. The accuracy of our interpretation of what our partner’s behaviour means is critical to communication effectiveness. Therefore, the understanding of the personality type of our spouse is a major step towards better relationship, removing the proverbial straw that could break the camel’s back in the long-run. 

If you have not done so yet, do invest into finding out the personality types of yourself and that of your spouse. One test you may use for this purpose.

Learn as much as you can about the personality types you have discovered yourselves to have. Some of the websites on this are as follows; freewebs and Young People's Ministries.

Note: Every personality has its strengths and weaknesses.

Worth Thinking About
Take a moment to reflect on the Scripture of this week’s Moment,…

‘If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be.’ 1 Corinthians 12:17-18.

God does not make mistakes. He knows the strengths that you need from your spouse for you to reach the full potential of life that He is giving you. ‘So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.’ Matthew 19:6.

Worth Praying About
Take time to pray this prayer on the emotional aspect of the life of your spouse.

‘Lord, thank you for the deep thoughts and feelings of my husband/wife. Enable me to know when the enemy is trying to use these for evil so that I can pray against it.

Thank you for my husband’s/wife’s sound mind.  Protect him/her from the enemy’s lies and help him/her to cast down “every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5). Give him/her discernment about his/her thoughts and enable him/her to identify any lies about himself/herself, his/her life, or his/her future. Help him/her to recognize the enemy’s tactics and remind him/her to stick to Your battle plan and rely on the sword of the Spirit that is Your Word. May he/she turn to You rather than to give way to negative thoughts.

Make me aware of my husband’s/wife’s struggles so that I can talk to him/her openly about them. Enable us to communicate clearly so that the enemy cannot cause confusion or misinterpretation. Help me not to react inappropriately or emotionally when I cannot understand him/her. Instead give me the patience and sensitivity to pray for him/her.’

Worth Doing
Learn the personality strengths of your spouse and take note of them. Find an opportunity in the next few days to express your appreciation of the strengths that your spouse brings to the marriage life you have together.